Wrecking Ball

Every year, at the beginning of the year, we are bombarded with fitness and healthy eating products to promote one of the most common new year’s resolutions.  It seems that, at the beginning of each new year many of us intend, to start the year by doing the following things: lose weight, eat healthier or change diet, get more fit and exercise regularly; especially, as inspiration sets in to start fresh in the new year.  Like many people, I had the same aspirations and planned to stay on track in regards to my fitness as work and daily life sometimes caused for me to put going to the gym on the back burner in order to meet some important deadline.  Unfortunately, for me, the beginning of that particular new year was the beginning of my nightmare, aka cancer battle.  Of course, before being properly diagnosed with cancer for the month of January and some of February, I along with everyone else thought it was pneumonia and then a million other illnesses as discussed with me by numerous physicians.  

The onset of my cancer battle wreaked havoc on my body, including causing for my organs to start shutting down.  Once I received a diagnosis, I thought the treatment (chemo) would help me feel better right away.  I thought that what I had seen in movies regarding chemo treatments had been exaggerated in terms of the side effects because I was feeling okay while receiving my first round of chemo and shortly thereafter.  Of course, I now know that quickly changed as the side effects hit me like a wrecking ball.  This effect they had on my body and mind was the worst I had ever experienced in my life up until then. Unfortunately, this was only the beginning of this terrible C word (Cancer) was going to cause on my body and mind.

Nothing prepared me to face the significant changes in my body composition and mental state.  I felt so sick a great majority of the time that I did not have energy or the desire to exercise or even eat.  Meal replacement shakes were awesome to help me during these times, that is only if my body didn’t reject them and get rid of it as well.  I went from having muscle definition in my legs and arms to non-existent muscles.  I had a million thoughts racing through my mind from happiness to depression in a split second.

Cancer changed me in every aspect of my life from experiencing chemo brain, mental instability (depression) and body changes (loss of muscle, looking red, no hair, etc.) to altering my daily routine, like not being able to work and being bed bound. Of course, the changes didn’t stop once the cancer was in remission. Life after cancer was equally as challenging. After experiencing drastic changes physically, and mentally it took me a minute to get back into rhythm with my previous daily routine (going to work and performing day to day activities). Fortunately, thanks to getting my miracle from God, I was able to take on the next battle of working on myself to regain my physical and mental self to be able to move forward and enjoy the blessing of being alive and being able to live life to the fullest.  

#Bodychange