Calm before the storm

After my cancer diagnosis set in and I had time to process everything I decided to fight for my life. I started being on track with every chemo session and following all the rules and guidance given to me to beat my cancer.  I was positive that doing this I would definitely be cancer free soon. After some time had passed the doctor ordered a scan to check the status of my cancer because according to statistics available at that time everything indicated that I should be cancer-free.  I was thrilled to go to this particular test because I could see the light at the end of the tunnel.  After I took the test, the doctor called me to tell me to go in to his office to discuss my test result and he requested that my parents be present as well.

At the doctor’s office, the wait to go into a room to see the doctor seemed like an eternity.  Once we were finally called in to see the doctor, the worried look on his face said it all. I knew then that it was not good news.  He explained that according to all the statistics I should be cancer-free but unfortunately the results revealed that I still had cancer.  He explained that he was sending me to another out of town hospital for more testing and for input on next steps in my medical treatment.  I literary felt my heart break into a million pieces, I was devasted even more than when I was first diagnosed.  This was not the news that I was expecting.  I should have known, that when he requested that my parents be present it was not good news but I was so hopeful and positive that it didn’t even cross my mind. It’s like they say it was the calm before the storm.  At home, I had a conversation with my mom and I expressed my feelings and she comforted me.  She reminded me that being hopeful and positive doesn’t mean that you are happy all the time or that you will not have bad days.  It means that during challenging days, having faith, hope, staying positive and believing in God is a way of knowing that better days are coming.

If you are going through bad times or challenging days like I did, don’t lose your inner spirit despite how difficult your troubles appear.  Remember God will take care of you like HE took care of me.  “Fear not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God.”  Isaiah 41.10


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